Of Words and Gestures...

Sometimes all you need is a kind,considerate word.
Sometimes even that is not enough.
Sometimes they say the thought is all that matters,and yet is isn't is it???
You wanted a thought, you got a word.
You needed a word, you got a gesture...
A gesture...
A signal to the hope that is possible.
A hope long lost
Of goodness,of Humanity.
You lay there at the street corner,
Bleeding,faithless and helpless.
You gave up and lost hope
Thinking it was over and
You were done for.
Death seemed a looming possibility,
Not so far away.
You closed your eyes letting it sink in.
Said a little prayer,
A prayer without hope.
A prayer to a God who had stopped answering long back
A God who had just become an idol on your rack.
And yet you closed your eyes
In silent prayer to a dubious God.
And suddenly you feel a hand on you your shoulder as u lay,
And there she stood looking down at you,
A worried frown,
Some flying tendrils of hair out of her hood.
She took out her tiny white handkerchief,
(Whoever uses those these days???!!!)
And wiped your bloody brow.
You lay there in disbelief
Yet helpless like a baby, you let her help you!
Her rosary beads...
She looked down at you with worried eyes,
And your pain is numb...
Your agony passes
As a tiny smile escapes you.
You smile at the irony
Your lack of faith,
Your irreverence...
And here she was helping you
A Child of God
Who had pledged her life to Him...
And still you lay there,
Disbelieving Ingrate!
You let the smile stay,
She calls out to you...
You close your eyes.
A silent apology,
A return of faith,
A thankful prayer...
And then you peacefully embrace Him...
.... Your Father!

This Life...

Life is an experience
A culmination of experiences.
It never did matter what was good or bad,
All that mattered and still does is that
The lessons are yours to learn
And the mistakes are yours to make.
The sorrows are yours to shed tears on
And the joys are yours to rejoice and celebrate.
One complains and grumbles,
Feels sorry for oneself.
There are regrets,regrets one detests oneself for.
Wishes unfulfilled,
Insatiability at its prime...
Oh the human condition!
The caprice of it all.
Oh whim!Oh fancy!
Ain't you a crime?
A human failing!
Yet an experience in itself.
An experience of a lifetime.
Life is eternal,
It goes on forever,
Only entities change,
And the experience continues.
Value and cherish the experience
While it is still yours to call.
It is a gift of the universe...
This LIFE!!!

A Sister's Tale

She was born

To be my plaything

My beautiful DOLL!

Walking and talking,

Someone I could dress up!

Then I realised she was fragile

I had to be careful.

She was so tiny...

It was okay if I played with her

But everyone wanted to play with her

I didn’t want to share...

And then realisation struck

They only wanted to play with her

I was jealous...

She was COMPETITION!

Then she became a parrot

Annoyed me to the core...

She did everything I did,

Wanted everything I had or wanted.

My RIVAL!

I learnt what was mine

Was hers too.

I learnt she was family,

I learnt she was important.

And then I grew up still

And I had to look out for her

And protect her

And then she was my kid too

My RESPONSIBILITY!

She put her trust in me,

When she looked up at me and silently slid her tiny hand into mine,

I felt she trusted me with her life.

She counted on me to tell her what was good

What was fun and what was right.

She saw the world through my eyes...

Made her judgement through me...

She made me responsible,

She was my student...

And then she grew up

Half child, half woman,

She had learnt to make her choices,

Her own decisions.

It was sure hard to let go,

To watch her grow,

Not needing me anymore.

And just when I thought I was forgotten,

She looked back for approval,

The same trust in her eyes.

Asking for an unsaid promise that said “I will always be there”

I realised she had grown up

And yet she was still there,

Still the same, that baby,

Trusting and helpless.

She had grown up to be my kid

Who made me a friend, motherly and yet a child still!

To my kid sister, Kiddo with love!

On Solitude

Life is about choices,longings,wishes and conflicts..
Its not the external violence that kills but it is truly the internal conflict that can't be survived.
One strives to be a survivor and succeeds too,
But it comes with a price
A price that seems like nothing to those who haven't paid it.
The alienation and disconnectedness,
A sense of not belonging anywhere,dislocated.
A desensitising experience.
A sense of being a rootless traveller on an eternal journey,
A nomad.
The world appreciates your strength,your conviction and has pride in you.
But what pride is there in sheer lonliness???
Because the brave are always the lonliest.....

I...

In a crowd,
I push my way through.
Silent and observant....
Questions exist
But are left unasked.
An understanding of an innate reality,
Makes me ponder and brood.
There's this despair I can't put my finger on.
I watch the world pass by.
Lives entwined in some way or the other.
Family, friends et al.
Yet I am silent and observant..
I walk in and out of here and there
Sometimes in the middle of it all,
Sometimes not at all.
Sometimes I reach out
And at others I need to be found..
And yet at others I just need to hide.
Ah Solitude! My friend you are...
At those times I crave for you
But then you refuse to leave
And then there is the haunting...
I walk back out there
To brave it all...
Am nameless,faceless and aimless,
And yet I walk out there
To brave it all...
And yet it persists.
This disturbing quietude.....!!!!